


In total darkness I reach out (and touch)

by blueberrywizard



Category: Daredevil (TV)
Genre: (or actually compliant depends how you read it), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Avocados, Foggy Nelson Is a Good Bro, Foggy Nelson Needs a Hug Too, Foggy is more observant than in the series, Foggy is too good for this world too pure, Gen, Human Disaster Matt Murdock, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Light Angst, M/M, Matt Murdock Needs a Hug, Matt still doesn't know how ask for things, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Not Season/Series 03 Compliant, Or don't, Touch-Starved, Wordcount: 1.000-3.000, put your ship glasess on if you want, your choice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 22:01:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17455055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueberrywizard/pseuds/blueberrywizard
Summary: At first Foggy thought that Matt is scared.or Matt and Foggy are back together a little bit quicker that we got it. And they work through some issues (read: Foggy does). Matt is just a sad disaster.





	In total darkness I reach out (and touch)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! It's my first work in this fandom (or at all to be precise) wrote in English so I'm a little bit nervous. I wanted to challenge myself a bit and I thought about this despite my uni homework waiting for me patiently in front of me. I've never been on the road to make healthy decisions. 
> 
> Please, be gentle with me, but let me know if I made some mistakes. And forgive me for mess with commas (I totally used them as I liked, because oxford comma works differently in my first language). And tenses. And all of it.
> 
> (title from Touch by Troye Sivan)

 

 

At first Foggy thought that Matt is scared. 

 

He said couple of awful words. He knows it. It was dirty and painful. He wanted to cause him pain. He wanted it so bad that he was afraid of himself, afraid of what he could become. And he threatened him to kick his ass, so yeah, maybe Foggy thought that maybe Matt was scared he’ll do it (they both knew Matt would let him do it).

 

But his face didn’t show fear. He rarely feared anything. Foggy saw something he couldn’t decipher, at least not then.

 

So he thought that maybe it’s his body: a compulsive reaction to months and months of violence. Nothing to worry about (he knows how it sounds, okay? But it’s better to think that because it’s not his fault even if some things are. He abandoned him in time of need and it’s burden he would carry like Matt’s carrying his guilt). Maybe he won’t startle if Foggy will move slowly and gently and stay calm. Even though he wanted to scream and kick and punch something because he  _ sees _ not entirely covered bruise on his left cheek and he  _ knows _ his chest doesn’t move as it should.

 

He’ll do what he has to do. He won’t get pushed away again. So he’s calm, and he keeps ice packs in the fridge for him.

 

But his face didn’t show fear. He rarely feared anything. Foggy saw something and he immediately wanted it to disappear. Whatever he felt made him even more miserable that he already was. 

 

No. He can’t. They promised each other honesty. He won’t pry. If Matt needs to take his time, fine. It can’t be a big deal, can it?

 

It’s peaceful evening. They sit on Matt’s couch and they’re watching some movie which actually have pretty decent audio description. He knows Matt likes it better when Foggy comments everything on screen, but he haven’t said anything about Foggy being silent this time.

 

He knows him. He knows he’s thinking that it should be enough for him; he has Foggy in his life again. It should be enough, it _is_ enough, he doesn’t need anything else, anything _good._ He can make it just like he always does. 

 

Foggy aren’t paying much attention to the screen and Matt can feel it. He slowly gets more and more tense. But he’s still silent. Foggy has his way with words. Maybe… maybe it’s time to try his way with actions.

 

He brushes his fingers against Matt’s neck. It’s a delicate touch and doesn’t last long. Foggy couldn’t make it more innocent even if he tried. 

 

Matt’s reaction is surprising anyway.

 

For a second he leans into him, silently begging for more. Reminds him of cats he used to pet when he was a child. He would’ve smiled if it wasn’t for what happened next.

 

He jumps a little, his face twisting with disguise and pain, mixed with this  _ something _ that isn’t fear but maybe it’s just plain panic. He jerks away and desperately tries to blink away tears; Foggy sees his glassy eyes since his glasses were left behind on a kitchen counter. He tries to curl up in a ball without moving and he silently listens (he’s not) what speaker is describing on the screen.  

 

“Matt?”

 

He picks up his knees like he decided he doesn’t care anymore. Maybe he doesn’t.

 

“Buddy, I think we need to talk.” Foggy tries to be gentle, he really does. It’s not easy for both of them, hearing these words. They had their share of talks beginning with them and it almost never ended well. 

 

But they promised something to each other. 

 

Matt looks like he’s seconds from bursting out in tears. Foggy can’t see his mouth twisted in very ugly manner only because he’s hiding his face in worn material of pants. 

 

“Are you…? No, this isn’t a good way to start a” Use your words,  _ Franklin. _ “Would you rather have me asking before I touch you? I know how it was, but now it’s a bit different, and it only seems respectable to ask before doing anything that would make you even slightly uncomfortable.” Patience, Foggy. Be calm, be steady. 

 

Justice is blind and she’s still balancing her scales perfectly. They’re like these scales. Balancing each other. Or at least they try to do it.

 

“Talk to me, buddy. I don’t want to take a blind shot here.” There was a time when blind jokes made (almost) everything better. There also was a time when they both were innocent and not scarred for life. 

 

Matt mumbles something to his pants. 

 

“I know your hearing is spectacular, but mine isn’t. Gotta speak louder, pal.” He encourages him further, because they’re both trying to make it work again. 

 

“It’s just… a lot.” Matt says after a couple minutes of silence. 

 

“In good or bad way?” Foggy needs to be sure, he won’t take anything for granted anymore, he knows better now. 

 

“Just a lot. More… more than I can ask for.” Words are even quieter than before and it makes Foggy uneasy. Suddenly, he remembers when he asked Matt to come home with him for Christmas. He did the same thing then, overwhelmed with sudden attention and affection he wanted to make himself look small in desperate attempt to become invisible. His knuckles were white from gripping rough material of his jeans and Foggy wondered if he’s trying to stop himself from rocking back and forth. He also startled when Foggy spontaneously hugged him, but he wasn’t so tense then.

 

“You can ask what you want; that’s why we call it ‘asking’. Do you want me to cuddle you maybe?” Foggy knows that direct questions were the best. Simplicity and patience, Nelson’s home brand. 

 

“I don’t…”

 

“No, Matt, I asked what you  _ want. _ I know what you don’t want, I really do. So let me, buddy. And since you won’t ask it for yourself, I’m willingly giving it to you. Just reach out, Matt. That’s all I want.”

 

He looks unsure, unprepared for any consequences. 

 

He’s taking a leap of faith nonetheless.

 

“I would like that, Fogs.”

 

Foggy smiles and after a second Matt smiles too. He melts into Foggy’s warm embrace as quick as he open his arms. A content sigh leaves Matt’s lips, but it’s so quiet that both of them can deny it if they want. But what they both  _ want _ now is simple.

 

They just want  _ each other. _

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't plan anything when I wrote it, probably that's why this is a total mess (I like my works a bit messy, but it doesn't mean it's always good to read, you know). Anyway, I just wanted soft Foggy because I love him and he deserves the world. Idek I should probably go to sleep.
> 
>  
> 
> Leave something if you liked it or if I should change something!


End file.
